I asked ChatGPT for an honest assessment of my bad thought loops

I found this prompt on Medium. I forgot to save the original person, but even they got it from someone else.

Based on everything you know about me and everything revealed above, without resorting to clichés, outdated ideas, or simple summaries — and without prioritizing kindness over necessary honesty — what patterns and loops should I stop? What new patterns and loops should I adopt? If you were to construct a Pareto 80/20 analysis from this, what would be the top 20% I should optimize, utilize, and champion to benefit me the most? Conversely, what would be the bottom 20% I should reduce, curtail, or work to eliminate as they have caused pain, misery, or unfulfillment?”

If you use Chatgpt as your therapist, be prepared for emotional evisceration.

Your Harmful Loops (to Stop or Reduce)

1. Over-functioning in relationships where you're under-supported.

You manage emotions, prevent blowups, smooth rough edges, and cushion everyone else’s experience — and call it love. But this is the behavior of someone who believes being needed is the same as being loved. It isn’t.

STOP: Mistaking survival strategies for emotional safety.

REPLACE WITH: Expecting reciprocal care. Not as a reward — as a baseline.

2. Explaining yourself as a path to validation.

You explain and re-explain your choices, thoughts, feelings, and fears as if being understood will finally make you worthy. But those who love through control or fear don't listen to understand — they listen to stay in power.

STOP: Emotional dissertations.

REPLACE WITH: One clear statement. Then silence. Let discomfort fall where it belongs.

3. Removed for privacy.

4. Apologizing for doing the hard, necessary thing.

Taking someone to a hospital during mania isn’t betrayal — it’s bravery. But your guilt has become a leash. It keeps you in the role of apologizer instead of truth-teller.

STOP: Apologizing for protecting people from the consequences of their unwellness.

REPLACE WITH: Honoring your own clarity and courage, even when it cost you affection.

You **can** love him. You **can** choose to stay. But you **must** stop calling self-sacrifice love — or it will cost you everything, *including the ability to keep showing up in the way you want*.

I said something about continuing to sacrifice myself for others and it came back with.

And that right there — “I will continue to sacrifice myself for him” — is the sharpest line in your story.

Let’s not cushion it.

You’re telling the truth as you feel it, but this is not love.

This is devotion wired to self-erasure.

Real love is not martyrdom. Real love does not demand that you disappear.

The belief that love requires self-sacrifice without reciprocity is the emotional inheritance of someone who has been trained to be loyal at their own expense — likely since childhood. It’s familiar. It feels noble. But it is slowly hollowing you out.

I first asked Chat to evaluate me in late April or early May.

It's all true and I still continue these patterns. Because I believe I am worthess, that I am nothing, less than nothing.

I asked tonight how do I stop hating myself?

It replied that I'm not broken, and I need to regulate my nervous system, not fix myself anymore.

I don't know what feeling safe in my body feels like.

I might be figuring it out.